Ideas Go Here

      The last two days, I sat and looked at a computer screen, trying to think of an idea for a new blog post. Ha! Think, I can’t think, my brain tells me thinking hurts. I finally got it, I want to write about love and its common misconception with marriage. Society makes us feel like we must be married to be happy when some people are better off alone. Some people are better with themselves or need to be with themselves. There are usually three reasons why people get married. The first is religion. The second is family and the third is because they can’t be alone with themselves for more than an hour. I am being facetious, but you get my point, can’t be alone with themselves. So, let’s dive into it!                 Religion is a big thing around the world, here in the US it’s a huge thing in the southern states. I won’t go into too much about religion, but it seems to fuel a lot of people...

The summer sun casts over us,  soaking into our skin.  The summer days,  create memories in our minds, whilst the summer nights, create passion in our hearts.  The idea of love scares you,  but it welcomes you with open arms.  Embrace the truest of feelings,  because love never dies.  And never lies. She holds the key to your heart, your only fear holds you back.  Don't forget to do your part,  leave the past in the darkness,  even if your heart's still cracked.  Let her in. Let her in.  She'll love you harder than anyone before,  because you both wanted more.  Love conquers all they say,  but yet you still run away. Everything will be okay,  in due time. Open your heart,  Open your mind,  that girl loved you from the start. She's a great find,  that's not after a dime.  See she loves you,  and will stay true,  For no one but you.  Money may rule the world,  ...

The way his hair lay above his brow,  Her body heating up, Like a jolt of electricity.  His bright brown eyes,  Pouring into her soul, Taking her back to the start. How can she forgive him? How can she love him? Anymore. The way he controls her thoughts, Actions,  And feelings.  She finds herself lost in this darkness, Staring back in a mirror, Wishing she could get away, Stay away.  It’s keeping her in the past,   Not able to be herself, Going downhill fast. She has to stay on track,  Never looking back. His hands travel to her throat. Squeezing, Teasing, Pleasing. The low moan that escapes from her mouth,  Careful not upset him, Only the fear sets in. And he’s won. Her heart, Her mind, Her love.  Now she's back at the beginning,  Wishing she was winning. Only fear has won,  The fear of him. Fear he’ll leave, Leave her alone. Leaving her in her mind,  Crying all the time.  How can someone have this much power? Over h...

I have been on this earth twenty-nine years now and I have no clue what the fuck I'm doing. I'm just trying to be a good person and do better for myself, whatever the fuck that is. In the last ten years, I've lost myself, found myself and fixed myself. I finally feel like I've fallen in love with myself and you have no idea how good that feels. It took me years to realize my worth and some people may never find it. I know what makes me happy, what can make me sad and what I can do to avoid the sadness. You'd think I'd learned that when I was fucking twenty-two, but no. I was too distracted, the self-loathing, the hate I had for myself. It was unbearable at times, where it caused the worse depression I've ever had. I still think to this day, what would've been if it worked? What would be remembered of me, if I took my own life that night, those nights. I woke up and realized I had a second chance at life. I was still here and it was for a reason, granted ...

  So I thought why not, I’m a millennial let’s talk about it. There is a Netflix documentary about social media and how it affects people, how it tracks who you are as a person. Facebook especially, who would’ve known Facebook could have an affect on your mental. At least I didn’t realize it could, not until now. Part 1 is going to be before I actually watch the fucking documentary because I want my opinion on “social media”. Social media is a way for people to either act different or maybe truly be themselves. Who fucking knows right? I mean I remember getting Myspace, wow fucking Myspace. How I created a world online for myself, posting photos, posts and really anything to grab attention. Granted I think I knew this wasn’t the way, but when you go to school with people that don’t accept you and come home to people that only half accept you. Online was a way to feel like you can accept yourself. The harsh reality is that people can be mean and brutal. I mean I don’t know how I did...

     The cool night air brushed against Jamie's creamy tan skin, as she walked along Marina Beach. The skyscrapers in Dubai's background towering over her. Xavier said he would meet her here at nine. Where can he be? She glanced at her phone, it was nine-thirty and he was thirty minutes past the time he said he'd be here. When she looked up, his eyes meet her's and she felt herself heat up. His piercing smile and bright brown eyes, were enough to have anyone get hot. He was hot, the wind picked up; moving his button up shirt wildly. He approached her slowly, grabbing her arm and pulling her in.  "Sorry I am late, I got held up at the office." He said, pressing his lips against hers. She moaned in his mouth, rubbing his tan skin as he slid his tongue in her mouth. He gently grabbed her face, running his hand to her neck. He pulled back looking into her green speckled brown eyes. "Did you want to go back to the room?" He asked, caressing her face, his...

The title is self explanatory, this is a page from my book. My life has been the biggest roller coaster ride I have ever been on, thinking I could race through it like NASCAR. As I grew older, I grew wiser, cautious and responsible. I left the party life in 2013, only slipping back for an appearance. I came far in my life, trying to fix my future because of past mistakes. So I thought why not, let's tell a few pages. The past is the past, you are in charge of future.      Let's go back to 2009, when I graduated high school. I had self image issues because of this cretin that I thought was something special. If something special was a fuck boy... When I moved to go to college, I was so ready to experience my life; rushing to run from the north. I knew I was a southern girl at heart, I loved the humbleness and hospitality the south had to offer. I was truly overly excited, but all the negative in my life. I wasn't ready, my crippling depression just years from ex...

      The way he kissed her lips, she felt the jolt of electricity through her body. She took a step back, looking into his green eyes. He smirked, pulling her back in for a kiss. He ran his hands gently over her body, squeezing her ass, forcefully. She moaned into his mouth, as he picked her up; pushing her up against the wall.  "Josh." She moaned softly, as he wrapped her legs higher up his back.  "Do you want this?" He pulled back, searching her wanting eyes. She grabbed his face, pulling his lips to her collarbone. He moaned into her neck, kissing softly. She wrapped her arms around his neck, as he backed off the wall. He grabbed her ass, walking her over to the bed. He gently put her down on his silk sheets, tugging at his pants. His pants fell to the floor, revealing his hard cock in his tight boxer briefs. Her eyes grew wide, contemplating what was about to happen. Was she ready for this next step with him? Or should she wait? He smiled, climbing on t...

As the words leave my thoughts, all I can think is “He’s out” He’s out. The man that took my sister’s life, is out.  I told myself years ago that forgiveness is the only way to get over the anger and as true as that is I don’t know how to feel. I feel angry, hurt, betrayed. A memory comes back and I am thinking about two months before this all happened, when he asked me for a ride. So I picked him up with my best friend and as we drove through the FermiLab, we laughed and joked, having a good ole time. When I dropped him off, I begged him to leave my sister alone. He ten years her senior and she still needed time to grow up, not knowing what she really wanted in her life yet . He laughed at me, he laughed as I told him I’d kick his ass if I found out he was hanging out with her again. Here we are seven years later and she’s gone. I think about her all the time, about the way things had been with her before I went to rehab. How I am so forever grateful to my mom f...